I always thought I would have 3 children. Not sure why entirely? I grew up in a family with 3 kids. Something seemed off to me in families with 2 or less (not passing judgment on anyone, I just wanted 3). After we had our second child that ‘want’ shifted a bit. The transition from 1 to 2 was harder than I thought it would be. I didn’t feel like I had the capacity to be the Mom and Wife I wanted to be. It didn’t help that our second child did not sleep through the night until age 3.
Once he reached a certain age I felt ready again and tried to convince Muscle Man (the stay-at-home parent) that we were ready to add to our family. When my Dad died in 2010 it hit home even more, Dad had one brother who died in a motorcycle crash in 2007, a family with 2 kids all gone within a short timeframe. I thought of my boys and it made me sad.. Around that time a couple of close friends got pregnant…with TWINS!! MM did not like the trend so we put it off a little more.
When I started my new job I felt like the work/life balance would lead to re-opening the Baby #3 conversation. And it did.. Soon after I transitioned, hubby was on board and we started “trying.” Don’t you love how that term is socially accepted? With the boys we didn’t have to try, in both cases we got pregnant the month prior to what we had planned. So I just assumed it would work the same way.
It didn’t, 8 months later and nothing. I gained empathy, which is never a bad thing. Every month I was hopeful. I would convince myself (My heart) that I was having the common pregnancy symptoms, then nothing..
We decided early on that we would not intervene. Not make it technical/clinical. If it happened it happened. The “If it is meant to be” approach. The months passed, I would see pregnant women and babies everywhere.. Every time I saw a Garage Sale full of good baby stuff I would get a surge of excitement, but I couldn’t/shouldn’t buy anything, because what if it didn’t happen??
Come October I had about given up on the idea, I decided to not think about it…. Much easier said than done. Amazing when you relax about something that your body knows what to do.. I had a dental appointment the same day that I was due to start my cycle. I didn’t want to have anything done IF there was a chance I was expecting.. so I purchased a test at lunch and used it in the waiting room of the office. I waited and the line was a faint faint pink…but it was there!! I took a picture with my phone and sent it to Muscle Man. He was in denial that any line meant pregnant, he wanted a solid dark line. We took 4 tests over the next week until we knew..
Last night we had the 12 week ultrasound and the baby was very active which was amazing!! This may explain to some why my blog has been a bit different in the past few months J Going forward I will use the blog as a week by week record of my pregnancy and my attempt to keep active.
Pregnancy Week 12:
*My goal is to walk/run 10-15 miles a week as long as I can. I am a little behind but will get there.
Miles Run Pregnant: 112
Miles Walked Pregnant: 9
Current Craving: Honey Nut Cheerios and Chicken Pad Thai
Current Aversion: The smell of Steak and Hamburger cooking
Baby Likes: Fruit!!!
Baby dislikes: Peanut butter and chocolate, I want to eat it but feel gross after
Excitement: Seeing the Ultrasound
Gripes: Headaches, fatigue and nausea
Purchases: A onesie on the Christmas clearance rack that says “Who you Calling an Elf?” it was .70 cents
A few people asked on Facebook if we will be finding out the gender. Yes at 20 weeks, end of February, if Baby co-operates.
Do you have any other questions??? Ask away!!